Eye Contact: Intimidation or Positive Communication?

Eye contact is an important part of building trust and relationships. It shows people you respect them and also conveys interest in what they are saying. But every once in a while eye contact can have a detrimental effect on a relationship, making the other person feel intimidated by your stare. This advice from Dr. Tony Alessandra will help you make sure your eye contact fosters rapport instead of inhibiting it.

"Make sure that when you make eye contact with others that it's not coming across as intimidation," says Alessandra. "If a person doesn't seem happily willing to make eye contact with you, consider your technique."

--Are you staring coldly? (As if you were a participant in a staring contest?)
--Are you relaxing your facial features and connecting warmly with the other person?

"Eye contact works best when it's not construed as intimidation," continues Alessandra. "Practice making eye contact with yourself in a mirror. Would you want to make eye contact with yourself during conversation? The answer to that question will help you determine how and what ways you may need to readjust your eye contact technique."

Tony Alessandra is a contributor to Top Dog Sales Secrets. He has authored 17 books translated into 49 foreign language editions, recorded over 50 audio/video programs, and delivered over 2,000 keynote speeches since 1976.

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